Weekend..

Saturday was a really bad day for me, which is unusual because D is home from work that day , I did however, Leave the house a good 4 times, and even drove 10 minutes away once, anxious the ENTIRE time,but in the end all that matters is that I did it, I can look back and know that its possible, not without anxiety but still, I got this accomplished.. Today I woke up, and started doing the dishes and remembered , I never took my vitamin yesterday, and they have made a HUGE difference, they dont cure me or make me better, but they make it manageable, I wonder how yesterdays adventures would have went with my vitamin... Today was such an amazing day.. I wouldnt trade today for all the money in the world, we raked leaves , we carved pumpkins, we sat down and ate dinner, I gave D, and P haircuts <3 I am about to go watch OTH, and today was ALSO not without anxiety of some type.. but it was much more manageable than it was yesterday....I took my medication on Saturday, I have yet to today... I am debating a glass of wine each night before bed, because it relaxes me, I just do not want to become dependent on it , Just like I dont want to become dependent on my meds.....Overall it was a great weekend, because I spent it with those I love, I hate that I am wasting my time here, worrying about when I wont be anymore :(