Look what came in the mail today... I am excited to start it when the kids go to bed.... I hear good things about it and I can only hope its the answer to my prayers, I wanted to start it the moment I got it, but it says do not start a chapter you dont have time to finish do not skim, there are parts that will make you anxious and if you skim you wont get to the parts that show you how to get through it.. So when the kids go to bed, I am going to tackle Chapter 1.
Grocery store today ... I took D with me, I couldnt do it alone, he drove and I still melted down on the way.. he however made me finish what I started, he use to enable me, until my psychologist said he was an enabler..lol.. I kind of miss the old days where he just accepted it and did what I said. I live through it , with NO gum and nothing to drink, I never panic only got anxious and cried a couple times, but I still went, its step 1...
I usually host thanksgiving this year I asked someone else to , what the hell was I thinking?? I have a hard time even leaving the house right now, why would I do that??? well whats done is done and I have to spend thanksgiving away from home, we shall see how this goes...
P has a soccer game and soccer pictures tomorrow and then to the mall afterward to get him some new jeans, he ruins his jeans so quickly, sort of frustrating.. but I have a soccer game , and the MALL, I am pretty sure this is every person with Panic disorders nightmare.. I am going to take my medication, because tomorrow isn't about me or my recovery on my own terms, its about my son.
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